Welcome to a Joke! ... That's Not a Joke!

ACC Screwing New Zealanders


If you feel this cartoon has some truth to it, then I hope you'll stay here for a few minutes. Follow your nose, read some of my words, then take a little action!

I'll quickly tell you I'm protesting against ACC and I'm quite intent on doing good job of it! A simple testiment to my success may actually depend on you. I'll say again: "your opinion," too!

If the cartoon above made you laugh, smile or nod your head in agreement, please take a second and take a vote (it's free).


First Poll

Your thoughts on the above cartoon?

Hey, I Love the cartoon it's true.
I could draw a better cartoon depicting the same idea.
I'm an ACC staff member or contractor and love the cartoon
This should be the New ACC logo
It's a silly and cartoon and not at all funny!

Current Results


I hope you had some form of opinion, a smile perhaps, and voted. Thanks, citizen, your vote counts here!


A friend recently sent me this picture as shown below. It's a picture of a 'give-a-fuck-o-meter'. Personally, I'm quite sure this is how ACC actually operates.

What are your thoughts?

ACC Help Desk

Second Poll

How ACC feel about us?

Yes that accurately is another Good Description of ACC
NO I strongly disagree ACC are great
I don't care I'm scamming the system
I'm an ACC staff member and yes its true
No, Thats a telecommunications device.

Current Results


I'm protesting not only for myself, but also for a lot of other good people, many of whom stand today feeling alone and absolutely helpless because of what has happened to them, a family member or close friend.
I confess I feel this way myself, that is:

"We are screwed right in the anus by ACC and with our own money!"


They say ACC has "no money" .... what this really means is: "You and I will get denied recommended treatment" - even though we may be a victim of an accident or injury.


What kind of an excuse is that?


I expect bankruptcy from private enterprise, NOT from our government! ... Hell, if we can bail out Air New Zealand, the Bank of New zealand and help the Fijians through adversity .... why not bail out the ACC Department as well? Just as travel and money is important to our nation, I suggest our health is, too!

Thanks again, citizen of New Zealand, for reading this far. Why not take another vote?

Third Poll

Let them Fall?

The government should let ACC go bankrupt
The government should 'Bail Out ACC'

Current Results


Some people may not have the courage or the money to actually take a stand and fight for our rights and the belief of "right" over "wrong". This is especially true when it seems to be a 'David and Goliath' situation. I've found many people will just chicken out, give up, or accept their situation. In good old rugby speak, "Drop the Ball".

Some people can't act or take action against ACC because they could risk losing their jobs, benefit, or other direct income.
I'm quite sure I'm not alone in my complete disgust with ACC. In fact most people I speak with agree that ACC is really 'a joke'.
It seems that most people seem to have had some trouble themselves or know someone who has. I even had a surgeon tell me one time that "ACC was a game!"

ACC is a game?

When it comes to your health and quality of life, Accident Compensation Corporation should NOT be a game! How do you get justice or service from any organisation described this way?

Let's play Pac-Man, Space Invaders or Grand Theft Auto with your health?


So if ACC is a game and a joke, it must be 'right' to protest their behavior. A protest will draw attention to ACC and the unconscionable way it's been working. And right now, lots of attention placed on ACC is good, good for me and good for you. The result may be that it will work better for us, and efforts to have it fixed may be intensified.

What are your thoughts?

Fourth Poll

Our thoughts about ACC?

ACC is a Joke
ACC is a Game
ACC is a Joke and a Game
I've sent them flowers becasue they helped me
I don't care I'm scamming the system
I have no thoughts

Current Results


On with the Protest:

I asked the boss if i could have time off. "Why?" he asked. "To stage a protest against ACC," I replied. He said, "Fine.
"Call me if you end up in jail!"

That being said, I have the day off. My boss agrees that sometimes you have to do what you have to do. The reality is that even he knows the truth: "If we are fixed and able to perform our jobs properly, then we will be more productive."

More productivity means more profits and wages, which means we get to pay MORE ACC levies and taxes. It's a win-win situation!

Fixing New Zealanders is not a financial loss!

In organising this little protest, I mentioned to a local businessman what I was doing and why I needed to make a little noise! "This noise is directed at ACC", I said. He gave me (for free) a squeaky horn worth $15.00 from his bicycle shop. I guess you could say he supports me! Not everybody gets to walk from a store with free products, but you may if your plight is true!

I don't think I would be allowed to protest for ever, and, personally, I don't want to. "24 hours is my goal".

Protest peacefully for 24 hours is my goal!


24 hours to make as much noise as I can against ACC so I can have a 'moral victory'. Today, my compatriots, we laugh and celebrate what a Right Royal 'Stuff Up' we have on our hands. "ACC - State Enterprise" as we know it!

Today I'm laughing at Nicola Herbert, Jeff Flack, Cathy Ward and a few others down there in Dunedin. They all tend to shuffle my file about spending lots of money about me but not much in helping me. It's pretty safe to say they are shuffling around a lot of other people's files, too! "You know who you are - ASC Review Team!". A victory for your team and budget you think?, Doing your job properly and examining medical facts? Helping injured people get better? I simply put it to the public - my arse they are!

In a week it's April Fools Day , hmmm... that's something I hope we all think about!
Who are you going to play a cheap stunt on?

What if everyone in New Zeland called ACC to tell all them people how wonderful they are and how proud we are of their fine work. Let them all know we are all thinking about them, invite them over for scones, or just express hope that they find a new job which better suits their attitude toward the public.

The Game is On Now, Good Friends ...

I've started an auction on Trademe.co.nz for a "Personally Signed" and Framed copy of my Cartoon. I promise it's as authentic as any of Helen Clarke's artwork. Please go to Trademe and search 'protest', 'cartoon' or 'Accident' or ACC. Hopefully you'll find it!

The important thing is: don't bid on the cartoon unless you want me to create an 'ANTI' give-a-fuck-o-meter. This is to say: any money, if at all, in donations, auctions or otherwise will go to good use, i.e., "apply more diplomatic pressure onto our failing state-owned corporation for answers as to why some many of us are in the unhappy basket".

By all means DO ask me questions about the auction. I will endeavor to do my best to interact with you while the auction runs.

It would be another small victory to record and capture everyone's questions and opinions regarding the cartoon.

"Ask Me a Question about the 'Protest Cartoon' on Trademe.co.nz"


A day out of my life really is not problem, to stand up for my health, quality of life and to expose what I believe is a most unfair process, from the first rejection right down to the courts where the situation becomes un-winnable for the average kiwi. In my opinion, this protest is worth every second of it. Hell, if I didn't have a wife and 2 kids, I'm sure I'd try hard to protest for a whole week with my squeaky horn!

The question is: Can I score my case on the give-a-fuck-o-meter with ACC?

My Claim No: 1002556254


During my protest, I also need some consideration for God and the Church to go about their normal business. After all, they're busy down here charging $5.00 per visitor to climb the Cathedral tower. Whilst I'm pretty sure God will forgive me for taking an "extra long view" of our great city, I'm not so sure about the Church.

I'm content here for just 24 hours, 24 hours of ACC non-stop in-your-face party action and fun! That's me, a fun person! A person who understands what a victory is. I've even got a beer for a "sweet toast", some balloons (I'm going to try some face painting a little later on) and some chippies! Oh, and let's not forget my little squeaky horn.

After 24 hours, I will climb on down ... probably go to the toilet and apologise again to the Church for my blessed behavior. Then I'd like to go home and hug my wife and kids. The day after, I will most likely go back to work. And then some days after that, it's April Fools Day. I can't tell you who I'm calling :).

And, hey, if ACC have a bad April Fools Day ... I was "only joking" and expressing an idea in public.

Does anyone know a good prank we could play on our friends at ACC? The ones who treat our health and well-being like a game?

Please email me here so I can share your ideas with the rest of the population.

My email: kiwiperson@orcon.net.nz

I've got some questions here I'd like to ask the dear old ACC (assuming they get wind of my protest):

Who the F**k is running this organisation, and who's the CEO hiding in the pile of legislation that I can bitch slap?
What's their email address, mobile telephone number and photograph (just for the record)?
I think we all have the right to know that! I assume we employ them, pay their mobile phone expenses, and own the email servers they use!


I want some really good explanations for why you have spent thousands of dollars on me saying 'no' to me when I have only asked you to review the medical evidence properly and okay a simple $7100 procedure. I have never once asked for any other form of compensation, only that they take medical advice received from qualifed professionals. Forgive me, but I'd say that's a reasonable request.

I want to know what use a case manager is if they are sent to help us blindfolded, gagged, wearing handcuffs and a straitjacket?

I have many more questions about my case. In fact, I think a lot of people have questions they would like answered, too.

So email me any questions you have, and I'll take them to the CEO of ACC.

Today, however, I'm going to have fun. I'm taking the piss out of ACC for the purpose of having a moral victory. A moral victory against the ACC Review team. "Great job people, I love your work and dedication"!

In fact, there's no reason why you can't have some fun, too. Join me now and on April Fools Day in bagging the ACC. Show them you care about your health and you care about the money you are forced to give them. Call them and say, "I love your good work".

Their telephone number is: 0800 101 996 (that's a free call number)

If that's busy try: 0800 650 222 (another free call number)

Here are some more ACC numbers should you ever need their help: ACC Phone Numbers


How You Can Take Action:

Print the cartoon, stick it up at your work, email it to a friend, stick it in a bus stop, stick it up whereever you can to make people smile, laugh and enjoy. Rejoice in the fact that you are not alone. At least then we can get some satisfaction for all the money we have given them. Every smile is a moral victory for us all! It will NOT be a moral victory for ACC!

What you need to realise is this:

There are many, many thousands of people feeling just like you and me, other citizens that have been betrayed by our ACC legislation. In between ourselves and the legislation is a department that spends more money betraying you than helping you. ACC earns billions of dollars each year and would rather engage in a "consultant" whose lowly education and advice seem to outweigh advice given by medical experts.

A famous New Zealand protester once said: "We have maintained a silence closely resembling stupidity"!

"We Need to Take Action and Not Be Quiet Anymore!"


The Problems Need Fixing Before You Increase Our Fees!


Please take some action yourself. Check out my cartoon on Trademe, and maybe call ACC on April Fools Day! For an even easier first step, how about just pushing the big red button below? I personally don't mind how you decide to take action for your affairs but will share with you the following thought:

"You will need to think a little differently to change your situation, especially when it seems the odds are against you!"

Next time you are broke because of your injury - go use ACC's showers!

Please click on some more buttons below. Let's feed ACC some free data (it's better, bigger and cheaper than a Morgan Stanley poll!).


Just a few more polls .. and we can party on. Try these on for size, then let's have some fun!:

Fifth Poll

Do you believe we are getting our monies worth?

Yes - I think its an excellent service
No - I think they could do alot better.

Current Results


Sixth Poll

Do you think ACC works well for Self Employed People?

Yes it does.
No its even worse than being an employee

Current Results


Seventh Poll

Do you think ACC is making unfair decisions to try and save money?

Yes, they are trying to save money before our health
No, they do their best to help every accident victim

Current Results


Eighth Poll

Do you get good service from ACC?

No, They lost my paperwork
No, They took/take forever
Yes, it was a great experience
Yes, their service was acceptable
Thier service is disgusting

Current Results

In closing: thanks for coming. My hope was to educate you with a simple fact. If you check out what's being said online (http://www.accforum.org/forums/) or (http://www.accfocus.org/) you'll see immediately that there are many people in New Zealand who feel we are not been given a good deal.

Remember: ACC is not an option. It's something every wage earner and business owner has to pay. If you own or register a car or motorbike, you have to pay. Is it fair to constantly take your money then deny you treatment?

I believe the Health and Well-Being of New Zealanders is NOT a Game!